Fear

What is fear? According to Webster Dictionary it is...

FEAR:

transitive verb

1 archaic : frighten

2 archaic : to feel fear in (oneself)

3: to have a reverential awe of (God)

4: to be afraid of : expect with alarm

intransitive verb

: to be afraid or apprehensive

This perfectly describes my state of mind the last few days. But before I go into the fear I need to back up & give you the full story...

Since David started on staff at SMBC more than 2 yrs ago I have heard about an amazing company called Freeset, from a sweet friend Kristi who works with them. (I have even blogged about them before here!) Freeset is a company based out of India that makes beautiful handmade jute bags. But what makes them even more beautiful are the hands that make them. They are made by women who have been rescued from prostitution. These women stand shoulder to shoulder on the streets of India to sell their bodies to whatever man will buy them. This is how they support their families & feed their children. Freeset will take these women off the street teach them how to sew these bags which gives them an honest way to provide for their family. They give them a fair wage, medical, retirement, they teach them about sanitation, but most importantly they teach them about how much God loves them!!!! How amazing!!!!!! Life changing!! This has become something I am so passionate about! And I have been saying that I know God has things planned for me with Freeset. I said "Lord use me!" Little did I know...

In talking with Kristi I knew there was a possibility of another trip to India this year. And I knew God was working on my heart to go. He kept bringing it up over & over & over again. My God is a relentless God, knowing full well how stubborn I am. I just continued to pray & think on it never mentioning it to anyone, even my hubby. Then one day I finally knew submitted to God & KNEW He has called me to go on this trip to India. And I am excited. I am pumped! Then this is where Satan comes in & starts to lay fear into my head.

"You can't do this!"

"Why do you think God wants to use you?"

"You come from the middle class, Bible belt, church raised, food always on the table, SAHM, Ministers wife, women's ministry passionate life! How you ever think you are going to relate to those women?"

(Yes he says it just like that with a-tti-tude!)

"What about flying? You know how much you HATE to fly, how you think you gonna get on a plane? Do you remember the last time you flew? Oh that was a sight!!!"

(again with the a-tti-tude!)

"MONEY! How do you think you can afford to come up with the money for this trip? Your still trying to sell your other house, just getting out of debt & now this? Ain't never gonna happen crazy!"

I could go on & on & on. These are all thoughts that have continued to run through my head the past few days. And I am ashamed to say I have let Satan get his foot in there. He is letting the fear creep in & I am falling into it.

I love how God works, I started writing this post in 1 frame of mind & ending it in another. In a good way! :) One thing that keeps jumping out at me is something Kristi actually said to me. I asked her if she ever gets nervous about her husband traveling so much. And her response was "Not really because the reality is he is safer over there in God's will than he would be here out of God's will." I want to be in God's will. My God does not call me to be fearful...

Psalm 27:1 "The Lord is my light & my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid?"

2 Timothy 1:7 "For God has not given us a spirit of fear & timidity, but of power, love, & self-discipline."

My God has called me to go to India.

Would you pray?

Pray for peace for me.

Pray for peace for my family.

Pray for the support to come in.

Pray for the small details that have to get worked out.

Pray for the big details that have to get worked out.

Please Pray!

Cass

On a side note...this happens not only in India but here in our own backyard. You think it doesn't in your town but it does! Just this week a massage parlor here in Birmingham was invaded by police & found women who had been trafficked in from other countries. It happens here too & it disgust me. All you have to do is google the statistics of sex trafficking in the USA & you will be astonished at the numbers. And not only that but how few laws we have to protect these women. Get educated & get involved!